What is Up with Nigerian People and Colossal Weddings?


Just last week, I was browsing Instagram when I saw a video of a man using a catapult to spray money at somebody’s wedding.

Then, within minutes, somebody whatsapped me a link to watch a woman come out of a bubble at her wedding.

But the one that broke the camel’s back was when I saw a bride struggling to come down from a horse at her wedding reception.

Though, to be fair, the horse bride was from Congo – not Nigeria but you get my drift.

Every time I see something like these videos, I always wonder.

People that are getting married in the town hall in Ibadan, and staying married for 30 years, do they have two heads?

Why is it necessary to lace one’s finger nails with gold sprinkles before a wedding ring can be placed on the finger?

I don’t understand.

And this behavior doesn’t start from the wedding, mind you.

Right from the engagement, people start to act as if they are stealing the money they’re spending.

I’ve seen somebody rent a helicopter to propose to his girlfriend.

Okay – fine. I didn’t see it. I got the gist from a reliable source.

My first thought was – how did the babe even hear what he was saying over the noise of the engine?

Also, do you really want the kind of wife that requires a helicopter before she will agree to marry you?

What happened to the good old days of men wanting the ride or die, “I will soak garri with you” chic?

Okay – all jokes aside.

The wedding is only one day. The marriage is forever (technically).

It’s okay to splurge on your wedding if you have the money to do so.

This is the key.

It is not worth it to go $10,000, $20,000, $50,000 into debt because you are getting married.

Think about what a wedding really is.

It’s a 1 hour ceremony (5 hours if it’s at MFM) where you haven’t seen half the guests in a year.

Followed by a 4 hour party where most of them will complain about the food (or the AC, or the color of the carpet).

When all is said and done, you will wake up the next day, next to your spouse – just the two of you. Just like the babe that got married in Ibadan.