This blog post pertains to recent events at Queen’s College Lagos, Nigeria.
It contains information that has actually been put into practice. So I know that this works! This is what you do when you spot a pedophile. Enjoy! xo
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What to do When you see a Pedophile
1. Give the pedophile a job
Ideally, make sure that this job is in a girls only secondary school.
Also, make sure the person has access to where the girls sleep at night. This will enable the pedophile do their job more effectively.
2. Check which country you’re in
Next, when you discover that this person is a real life pedophile that is destroying the lives of young girls, here’s what you need to do.
Then think about what country you’re in.
Depending on the answer to that question, put your hand on your chin, sigh, and say “AH! na wa oh!”
3. Check if you are religious
Depending on the answer, make sure you pray about the situation. For extra effect, raise your hands as you’re saying the prayers.
4. Check whether the victims of the pedophile are your daughters
No? They’re not your daughters? Ah. Thank God
5. DENY DENY DENY!
When the victims of the pedophile come to you, shut your door.
When the parents of the victims of the pedophile come to you, shut your door.
When the teachers at the school come to you, you know what to do. That’s right. Shut. Your. Door.
And when people attempt to discuss the matter, don’t forget to tell them to shut their mouths.
6. Stay STRONG!
You must maintain your resolve.
As a leader, you must not waver. You must be strong. Be resolute. Don’t change your mind.
Afterall, what can you do about the situation? You’re just an ordinary school principal.
Besides, the guy is the best of the best. He is the best you have at the school. You have to save his job at all costs.
Our lives begin to end, the day we become silent about things that matter
– Martin Luther King